JANUARY

The Ogre had just moved to AG to see where our relationship could go if he was closer.   I should’ve stopped him.  I told him he’d be blaming me for something in less than a week and pull the “I dropped my life and moved here for you” bit.  And sure enough, not 1 week later, it happened.  Should’ve just dropped him right then and there.  But I was depressed from the divorce and felt I couldn’t do better.  Fleh.   This month Baby Samuel was walking around and uncle Riki would help feed him, but not change him. I was karaoke-ing A..LOT with “the gang” at Mr. Ricks. Wasn’t like Sunset Dunes days but it was of course still very fun to be with friends and singing and dancing. Ben turned 22 and I tried my first Sake Bomb, which was totally gross and I videotaped it with “Ruby” my new camera that was a gift from The Ogre for New Year’s after George (my old camera) was stolen in November…when I irresponsibly left it at the bar. By the end of the month Cincinnati needed to move a couple miles down the road in A-town where she was living, and I helped her. We laughed at the oddness of what great friends we were and still becoming after the drama of a certain boy we were both involved with circa 1999.

FEBRUARY

Still going out quite often to karaoke at Mr. Ricks I would try new froo froo drinks (thank you Donkey Punch) but in the end I always like my 7 & 7. I just started working at Roxy Salon & Day Spa in SLO and began building a small following for my skin care and hair removal services. I successfully finished the first book in the Twilight series and was ready and willing to continue the series. I had finally watched the Movie Sicko and had decided I wanted to move to London or France.

MARCH

A Mini Family reunion I affectionately called the “Halfbreed Convention” occured. Cousins from Florida I haven’t seen in YEARS came into town and cousins from up north that I get to see once in a while came out and we ate Dadda’s rice, went to the beach (Yah. ME at the beach) took so many pictures it was crazy and we all went to karaoke (well the ones that were at least 21) and drank, sang and took more pictures. Jack and I would go to WildKat, a bar in Santa Barbara about every other sunday night. Cincinnati and I got matching “99” tattoos on our left heels.

APRIL

I had a birthday and “celebrated” my entrance into another decade. My sister threw my a fabulous party at her house with cocktail attire requirement and fun decorations and dancin’ and drinkin! Daaaannaa came to visit, somewhere in the late March and early April bit she came to Mr. Ricks with us and sang her signature tune then we took pictures of our cleavage. My room at Roxy got painted,  – it looked really pretty. Nicole Champeau made really really salty fried chicken (yikes) to celebrate Jason’s birthday and she made the most amazing macaroni and cheese dish with 4 or 5 cheeses.

MAY

I didn’t journal too much nor did I take many pictures to spark my memory. But in May I got to have coffee and lunch with Eleise Moore, a friend I met during my time at PCPA. We talked about community theatre and she was getting ready to move to Chicago. Cincinnati had a dinner party where she actually cooked (hahaha) and I wore a dress. Then we watched the videos of Michael Jackson’s number one hits and played a game where you look a picture (that the game provides) and we had to create captions. It was pretty fun, and funny. I also had quit a play I auditioned for. I’ve always wanted to be in Godspell, and then due to a few issues (personal and with the director) I left. I don’t really believe that that’s okay, but I had to do it. Shrug.

JUNE

Another mini family reunion occured. My cousin Tori and 3 of her kids came too. We had all you can eat pizza at Klondike’s and played charades . Battle of the Salons happened and my salon competed. I didn’t do any hair (or course) or make up, I showed up for support and ended up being the spokesperson for the salon when we went to talk about what the approach was to the theme. Which was “Gift Wrap.” I got to see Wicked for the third time.  Slumber party at Cincinnati’s house and I have a fun picture of all of us brushing our teeth. Took my first trip to Bridlewood Winery with my mom and fell in love with the property and the wine.

JULY

I attended Richie’s annual 4th of July BBQ.  We walked down to the beach and sat on the cold sand and watched the fire works. The Caper (Atreyu, my pseudo nephew) turned 3 and had a party that had a pool…I took Honeybear and he had a great time, and so did I watching them play together. SLO pride was during this month and Jack and I went again, we drank all day, took a picture with Tiffany (as in “I think we’re alone now) because she performed, then drank into the night. I returned to the front desk working at a local Hotel. It wasn’t my favorite, it wasn’t fabulous but it helped me get money. I auditioned for another play this month. The Mousetrap and was cast, unfortunately I again had to drop out for what I will call Really Valid Reasons.

AUGUST

Jack and I continued going out on sundays to Wildkat. Jack, Mark and I moved in together into a 2bed/2bath townhouse and it was nice to not have to use quarters to do laundry. I began my new blog series called “To Be Determined” since I finished the first series “Nobody Reads This.” My sister and Double T went to Disneyland and I was jealous. I was still working at the salon, and the hotel.

SEPTEMBER

I started looking for another hotel to work at, perhaps supervisory position or management and interviewed for a few. None of which came through. I attended my first Exposition. An annual expo with tons and tons of vendors, free samples, new products and products you can buy for cheaper than normal. Peanut turned 4, and Honeybear turned 2. Family night at Paisano’s is every tuesday with Karaoke and a few of us went, ate a lot of pizza and dessert and sang many many songs. Miranda and I went on our first Escape Date and did some wine tasting then took pictures of a tarantula in the middle of the road. I had never seen one.

OCTOBER

Ashley at my salon dyed my hair a dark red with peek-a-boo highlights and John Mayer turned 32. I made brownies, well I added the eggs and milk or whatever and baked ’em and we ate them in one night. WildKat nights. I went to a place in SLO where there was in an indoor firing range and I shot my first gun. I felt like Sidney Bristow, and I shot with both hands and was a little bit better and less tense with my left hand. Pumpkin carving madness happened at Dominnati’s house (that’s the celebrity couple name for Dominick and Cincinnati). We had salad and pasta and carved pumpkins. It was very time consuming but the result was rewarding. We also threw our first, and only party at the house on Rockaway. I bought a domain name, haven’t started using it but have an idea what I want to do with it.

NOVEMBER

Jack moved out with zero notice and deleted me from his life for reasons I don’t know. I stopped working at the hotel. Mom and her friend Joan Joan invited me and Smurf to Bridlewood winery for wine tasting and hanging out. And I met up with Kaza and we visited for a while in her new home and I met her daughter. Thanksgiving came and dinner this time was at Cory’s house in Nipomo, then my brothers stayed the night at my house and I attempted to make pancakes the next day. I asked Ashley to play with my hair again and we went redder with some blond streaks on top and some more underneath. It was dramatic and exactly what I needed. And Sister, Smurf, my mom and I went to “the Ranch” with Aunt Betty (my mom’s aunt) for the annual gathering. We drove for what seemed like forever, then an another 11.5 miles on a dirt road with mud and mist where we slid all over the place following directions like “stay to the right” and realizing we’d have to leave while it was still light outside because there were no lights. We were quite literally in the middle of no where. But it was pretty amazing and I’d like to go again.

DECEMBER

My brother Rik, who is now a junior in High School, is on the Varsity Basketball team and I was able to make it to his first game. He scored some points which was awesome and I had more “school spirit” for him then I did when I was in High School. He also turned 17 and Dadda BBQ’d for him, which was as excellent as always. I unfortunately couldn’t stay at the salon anymore and had to pack up my stuff from the room and take it home. I went to the Palm Reader in Pismo and had my right palm read for $10. She was pretty spot on about things, her fortune telling has yet to be proven (haha). Mark and I went bowling and I beat him. I auditioned for a play for the third time this year, oddly enough it is The Mousetrap and I was cast in the same role I got earlier in the year. Only this time I’m staying in it, and I am excited about it. Boyfriend Jenn and I took baby Samuel to the SLO Christmas parade and Honeybear stayed the night with me because Mr. Gutter flew in from PA and surprised Jenn. And I didn’t have much Christmas spirit. I was the Grinch and hated everyone, and at the last minute being with my siblings Christmas eve and morning made it better. Then in the end, The Ogre and I finally stopped.  Calling the cops on him was a better idea than hurting him physically, which I had to really try not to do.  I’d rather him go to jail, than me. I never want to experience anything like that “relationship” every again.

This year was one of the hardest years I had ever experienced. My emotional, mental and physical status’ were unhealthy and I didn’t care enough about me or others to do anything about it. During this year I also decided I wanted to return to school for a degree in theatre and am in the middle of the application process and have to audition for them still. Two are in New York, one is in Missouri. I spent New Years eve with members of my cast and Boyfriend Jenn who has let me move into her apartment with her and baby Samuel. And big brother Cory has offered a room at his office for me to do my esthetician work in. I am very happy to have SOMETHING positive happen for me and hopefully it will have a domino effect. The only goal on my list for 2009 that I accomplished was to read more.

I read:
He’s just not that into you
It’s called a break up because it’s broken
Dry
Twilight
New Moon
Eclipse
Breaking Dawn
Marked
Betrayed
Chosen
(almost finished…) Untamed
(almost finished…)Men are from Mars Women are from Venus

2010 Goals:

– Be successful at Cory’s office doing Skin Care
– Take better care of myself Mentally, Physically and Emotionally
– Audition successfully for the colleges and be accepted…AND get money to pay for it either with grants, scholarships and student loans or from the lottery of some sort
– Continueto read and exceed the amount of books I did in 2009, reading both educational and just for fun books