Last night I went to skarieokie for a few hours.  Sang alot since there were like 12 people there, and I didn’t even stay til the end.  I stayed til about 12:30, had to s.t.g.a at 7am this day.  I sang:

Here with me – Dido
Opposites Attract (With the GOD of course) – Paula Abdul and the ….cartoon cat?
Foolish Games – Jewel
Save the best for last – Vanessa Williams
Come What May (with Sir James) – Moulin Rouge
Elephant Love Medley (with Sir James) – Moulin Rouge
This used to be my playground – Madonna

James had come over and told me to sing the madonna one.  Wasn’t sure why, maybe it was just stuck in his head or something – I know that it meant something different to me.  This time I don’t know, I kind of related to it more.  But more so like Sunset Dunes and the whole gang that used to go to skariokie – they’re pretty much all gone.  There’s a few of us left – but no more chair dances it looks like.  Not without Kaza or Ro.  And quite frankly no one sings Evanesence like Nahnnah does.  Everytime one of the other girls I don’t know sing it (or I sing it) I shutter to think what people are thinking, and it’s not terrible per sé, but it isn’t Nahnnah.  Its like if someone else sang ” We all die young” instead of kevin….it just doesn’t fit somehow.  So yah, this used to be my playground made me feel like sunset dunes was becoming or became something we “did” something we used to do.  we used to go to sunset for skarieokie now  wel ALL LIVE IN NEW YORK. 

I don’t mean to imply I have no friends here, but I see kevin and vicki tuesdays and saturdays if I get over to Sunset, Brighteyes and I play once in a while – but conflicting schedules always get in the way of that.  Jax and I try to play  like once a week and it turns into once every other week. And I know I have friends here,  but do we really “hang out”  It’s not to say that maybe we’re just not close enough to call eachother up at random and say “hey come over and hang out for a bit” maybe I’m the “life of the party” but if there isn’t one – why call aiyani.  and I don’t mean that in a poor pitiful me way.  I’m not even mad, just curious and well – a little sad that Kaza, AND nahnnah AND NOW Ro are gone.  I know I’ll see Loke and Kitten and Lani and leah – eventually and around and about.  But, I don’t know.  I think my really really really really really really close friends all live far away now.  Some in Brea (hi mentor) some in hollywood (hi sweetpea) one in Utah (hi husband) and the rest are in NY.  I know I have to get out there, I know I need to save money.  I’m trying – and actually I’m doing a better job now.  I mean, my bank account now is at least always positive, and my tips from work are gas money.  But you know getting paid $7 ($3 after taxes) an hour for roughly 25-30 hours a week and trying to have even little things like a gym membership – are hard.  I mean, I now only have:

Car
Car insurance
Phone
Storage Unit
Gym

as “bills” but whatever I guess. A time for everything and everything in it’s time……..right kaz?

The rest of the week:
Today:  I think after rehearsal I’m gonna see Michael.  He’s been in Santa Barbara playing with a friend – yay for friends!!!

Thursday:  I have tomorrow off, gotta run to the post office and get some film developed and of COURSE go the the dance class at PBAC. 

Friday:  s.t.g.a at 5am – 10am, then rehearsal at 7p

Saturday:  breakfast with michael (probably at hobees, and “uh….sweetie?….more potassium like simone said k?”) Then to play with Jax, then an early dinner ish thing with B.E. sat night and of course Skarieokie saturday night at The Dunes – and MORE OF YOU SHOULD COME OUT AND PLAY!!!!!!

Sunday:  s.t.g.a from 2pm – 8:30p, apparently I’m a really great “pre-closer” so there’s that.

Sister’s supposed to come over tonight to watch and episode of Smallville from season 3.  I’m suppsed to get all caught up before Season 4 starts next week.

See ya.